Q: I divorced my abusive husband after he got in trouble and ended up in prison, and I told him I never wanted to see him again. Now he claims he’s found God, and he says he wants to restart our relationship when he gets out in a few months. How do I know he isn’t just faking it? — L.McS

A: You are wise to be cautious; not everyone who claims to be a follower of Jesus is actually committed to Him. Eleven of Jesus’ closest disciples truly believed in Him, but one — Judas — was only interested in himself and later betrayed Jesus.

Don’t misunderstand me, however; Christ is able to change even the most stubborn person, and this may well be the case with your ex-husband. Sometimes people have to reach bottom (so to speak) before they’ll admit they need God. And when they turn in faith to Christ and open their hearts and lives to Him, He welcomes them and forgives them and begins to change them. Remember: God “is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20).

I often think of the Apostle Paul in this regard. He was violently opposed to Christ, and did everything he could to destroy His followers. As a result, when Paul gave his life to Christ, almost no one believed him, and they rejected him. Only later, when they saw that his life truly had changed, did they welcome Him.

What should you do? Pray for your ex-husband, that he’ll get connected with Christians who can help him. Pray too that God will give you wisdom. Don’t be talked into any hasty decisions, however; take time to see if he is truly seeking to follow Christ. Jesus said, “By their fruit you will recognize them” (Matthew 7:20).

Q: You often say in your column that we need to learn to walk with God, but what does that mean? I don’t have any trouble believing in God, but I don’t think I understand what it means to walk with Him. — Mrs. E.Mc

A: The key is to understand what happens to us when we commit our lives to Jesus Christ. By nature, we are separated from God because of our sins — but when we open our hearts to Christ, He forgives us and comes to live within us by His Spirit.

In other words, we now have a personal relationship with God. We have become God’s friend — and He has become our friend too! But like any other friendship, our friendship with God needs to be nurtured. If it isn’t, our relationship with God will grow cold, and we’ll no longer see God as our friend. We may even become like the people of Jeremiah’s time: “My people have forgotten me, days without number” (Jeremiah 2:32).

How do we strengthen our friendship with God? How do we walk with Him every day? We do it the same way we strengthen our relationship with a friend, or with our spouse: we spend time with them — talking and listening to each other, sharing our concerns and joys, even helping and encouraging each other. In other words, we “walk” with them, enjoying their company and sharing our lives.

The same is true with God. Because He is with us, we can turn to Him in prayer at any moment, sharing our concerns and expressing our love for Him. We also can listen to Him, as we read His Word, the Bible, and hear others preach and teach from it. Make sure of your commitment to Christ, and then walk with Him every day.

Q: I start cancer treatments (chemotherapy) next week, and I admit I’m scared. I know I shouldn’t be, because I’ve given my life to Jesus and I know I’ll go to Heaven if I die. But if I had more faith I wouldn’t feel like this, would I? What’s wrong with me? — Mrs. J.R.S.

A: Nothing’s necessarily wrong with you; it would be unusual if you weren’t concerned about the future. God put within each of us a deep desire to keep on living (what is sometimes called our “survival instinct”). If we didn’t have this desire, we’d open ourselves to all kinds of dangers.

Don’t misunderstand me, however. God didn’t send Jesus Christ into the world just to make us feel good, or to help us through life’s little bumps. Christ came to take away the fears and doubts that haunt us, and to give us strength and hope in the midst of life’s greatest troubles. The Bible says, “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. … Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength” (Isaiah 40:29, 31).

Right now you’re facing one of the greatest crises you’ve ever faced. Yes, you’re scared — but how much more fearful would you be if you didn’t know Christ? As you face the uncertainties of the future, take time every day — even every hour — to thank God for His presence with you. You are not alone; Christ is with you! Thank Him too for the hope you have of Heaven because of Him.

In addition, let the promises of God’s Word, the Bible, take root in your mind and heart as they never have before. (You’ll find the book of Psalms especially helpful.) Jesus said, “My peace I give you. … Do not let your hearts be troubled” (John 14:27).