Say the Word Family and Think of Love

 

February 9, 2022

Saying the word family can conjure different images and emotions. For some people, family means sharing bloodlines and ancestors and may bring to mind a household comprised of parents and children who work as a unit, sharing chores, meals, values, and rituals. Sometimes these units join with extended family members to celebrate and share time.

However, that is more of a dictionary definition. After all, family reaches beyond biology, last names, and obligations. Others might define family as less of a birthright and more of a choice. Family might embrace all the people in our lives who commit to loving and supporting us unconditionally. They accept us as we are, lend stability, and provide a kindness that helps us thrive both individually and socially.

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, the topic of love is more center stage, and one family that captures this core meaning is the Cederberg family. Theresa (Cederberg) Cowan and Larry Cederberg have spent every Christmas together for the last 75 years. Cowan will turn 84 this May; Cederberg is 76. The siblings have two deceased brothers and one other living sister.


"Larry's side of the family has always been family oriented," reports Cederberg's wife, Roberta (Statelen). "We originally spent the holidays at his folks' home in Turner. When they passed, the gathering got moved to Theresa's at the Cowan Ranch for several years, and most recently, we have celebrated the holidays at the home of Larilyn and Sonny Birky."

This time together is spent eating, telling stories, and exchanging gifts. Some years the gift exchange is conducted as a Chinese Auction. One year they all exchanged names and purchased garage sale items. When the grandchildren were young, Santa visited every Christmas Eve.


"Everyone's invited," Roberta explained. "Marty's in-laws from Canada joined us one year, and Roy Kelly's parents joined us another year."

Marty is the youngest of the Birky family, while Roy is married to Renda, the Birky's daughter.

Although the holiday menu is typically turkey with all the trimmings, according to Roberta, the meal traditionally includes a wheat salad and a pretzel salad, as well as a broccoli cheese hot dish. And dessert consistently features pies. When asked about a favorite, one of the grandchildren stated, "Any pie Aunt Tudie (referring to Cowan) makes; it's the best."


In reply, Cowan said, "I don't know about that! Roberta is an excellent pie baker herself and has won Seed Show honors for her pies. Actually, I don't claim to be a good cook. My husband has been gone for 46 years, so I'm kind of out of practice. Everyone seems to appreciate my banana/coconut cream pie, though."

Being a widow has also increased Cowan's ties to surviving family. Family was her support system when she lost her husband. "We have always been a closely knit family," Cowan explained. "But I especially relied on them when I lost my husband. I had to pick up and keep going. Questions about family and love are difficult. Getting together is something we've always done and something I simply enjoy," she added. "Larry and I are eight years apart; he's the baby of the family, and we grew attached early. I remember him going everywhere with me, even riding on my bike."

Like a surrogate mother, Cowan claims, "I kind of raised him."

Time is another element that contributes to family's importance for Cowan. "We have to cherish the time we have since we don't know how long we'll get. Some families are split-either by distance or by conflict. Larry and I have been fortunate that we not only live within driving distance but have always been close."

After being invited to reflect on the significance of this relationship's longevity and the influence it has had on her, Renda Birky responded: "I have many wonderful memories of Grandpa and Aunt Tudie at Christmas. Honestly, nobody in our family knows Christmas without them! I look forward to Aunt Tudie placing her arm around Grandpa and saying, 'Well, another Christmas I got to spend with my baby brother.' The significance of this example means a lot to me now that my 'baby brothers' are grown men with families of their own. I am deeply grateful for the example my grandpa and aunt have set in making family a priority. We are truly blessed."

If we can get through all the time we are allotted in this life with all of its surprises and challenges and still maintain a relationship of that depth, then we can count ourselves as fortunate. Whether or not the people with whom we share this time are also those with whom we share a family tree, we can call family a nurturing relationship rooted in story and knotted with love.

 
 

Powered by ROAR Online Publication Software from Lions Light Corporation
© Copyright 2024

Rendered 03/29/2024 03:20